Caught up on some sleep

--Alright, I saw "Skeleton Key" last night. I won't give away the ending, I'll just say that I'm impressed. I had thought I figured it out several different times, and was feelin' pretty smart...but my aim was slightly off, lol. Good movie though! Don't know if I'll buy it when it comes out--It's like "The Others" and "Identity"-- once you know the ending, it sort of takes away from the experience.
--I get home from the move at about 2:00 this morning, and try as I might I could not get to sleep, errr. I watched some TV--There was a documentary about lightning, evolution, and another on the human psyche...So that cuts out a few hours...but still no sleepiness. So I watch "Animal Cops" on the animal planet...which just made me angry--it's an hour block of watching how animal police have to save animals abused by their owners--So I got sucked into the show--not a good show to watch when you're trying to go to sleep, lol. --After that, I leaf through my DVD collection--no success in choosing one. I decided to do some Tai Chi to sort of burn up the extra energy, which worked quite well. After about another hour, I was able to get some sleep...for an hour--then I had to wake up because I couldn't be in the house when it was getting appraised! I just go to Meijer, and look at some of the toys, and dog treats...then I found out I forgot my wallet at home--damn. I get home at about 10, and I've just been catching up on sleep ever since. Its a beautiful day here--first day in a few that's been sunny, and dry. So I'll probably find something to do outside, and just get to bed a little earlier tonight...though I know it never works that way...Someone will call, and want to do something, and I won't feel tired at that moment, so I'll go, lol...That's how it happens...But tonight, I'm wise to it--and I'm determined to get some sleep!! -- It's a curious thing. I don't know why we need sleep--it just doesn't make sense to me...but if you go so long without it, it just keeps getting harder to function...I think I should explore the limits. ;)
--I went to the dentist yesterday--I swear they hire those women (dentist assistants) there for their looks! Every single one of them looked like a model! I'm not saying that they were dumb or inadequate or anything like that--they were all well educated, and certified...just for whatever reason...they all looked like models!
--I'd compare the dentist office to going on a blind date. Same awkward questions--not as awkward as the answers though(it's hard to talk with someone's hands in your mouth, lol) ANYWAY! -- NO CAVITIES!! yessssss.
--well, I think I'm gonna head out--maybe get some swimmin' in before the days out. -- I'll blog more later, feel free to leave a message
-Ryan

The news...

--There was a terrible accident today in Athens...I've read the articles--seen the news coverage; Through blurred vision, and the feeling of falling...helpless. I was in such disbelief as I watched the cold news reporters...and the terribly graphic news articles...48 children "found" among victims of the crash...I saw a woman crying on the news coverage; no, crying isn't a strong enough word to describe what she was doing...and grief isn't a strong enough word to describe what she was feeling...my God the pain she's feeling--it's more than one would think is earthly possible. She's somehow transcended this world, only in part--only to feel some pain that she would otherwise be impervious...or oblivious to. She was filmed naked in front of billions of people--very few of which are even capable of shedding a tear...capable of giving a damn...
--Moments like these are only bearable when coupled with the existence of love...why do you have to go so far to find the good in this world--it's still never far enough to escape these terrible tragedies...The feeling of responsibility just cuts through me...but how would you fight to keep a plane in the air...how would you fight to keep a heart for breaking...how would you fight to preserve love, justice, and innocence. THESE are the things that are worth fighting for...these are the things disappeared from too many hearts. Why does this instill a sense of responsibility more than disappointment? I've turned my back on destiny, because this is what it brings...without cause--unbound by reason. I used to think it was a crutch for victims of grief...that if I just turn my back on it, then it would disappear.

--This is just me thinking...I almost didn't blog this...it's not that exciting...but I'm told "excitement is in the translation...interpretation." so here ya go, ;) --Feel free to leave a message!
-Ryan

--Oh, PS! Blast for the past!! I was rooting through all my things--packing things up for both the move back to school, and the move across town. I stumbled upon old letters...some I never even gave to the would-be recipient. I even found a poem I wrote for Lilly, who knows when! It had to've been like 9th grade! It's called "True Love" --It starts: "She looked at me...I pretended I didn't see her in hopes she would continue to look" Oh man! definite blast from the past!! Oh well, thought someone would get a kick out of that recovery. Cool stuff, lol.

The night always recedes

--Yesterday was just...one of those days. One of my "deep-in-thought" days...(I suppose I've just seen a bit too many evils of this world this last week...I was desperately searching for contrast. I just had to breath ;) --I retreated to, and found solace in "the place with the tall grass"...) Thanks for the cheering up, and the music suggestion (beautiful stuff by the way--I've heard it on the radio before too) I appreciate your thoughts--you've helped me more than you know.
--I leave for school the 19th. I can't wait to get back to it all. I've got a pretty hectic class schedule (Calc. 2, Chem., Bio., and Anth.) I think it should be fine though...Focus hasn't ever really been a problem for me.
--I'll be more mobile since I get to have my truck down on campus (Though I just found out that a parking pass will cost me $80! -- little bite out of my Norway funds, errr) I should be able to make that money up though, I'm still psyched about it. Soon I'll get together with a friend who's a total wealth of information about the subject! She's been a HUGE help in planning this whole thing, I so lucked out, lol...
--I'm gettin' pretty tired here, I'll blog more tomorrow, feel free to leave a message
-Ryan

The moon has set hours ago, leaving me among the shadows of another purged day
Faint traces of city light become more and more diffuse as I follow them up to the constellations
The clouds are painted with depth--bellies washed orange
Morning birds yawn, as shadows recede to their origins
Pools of night still linger places--
A soft glow drifts down from the top of the world
It floods across the surface,
Warms my face--I'm restored
The night always recedes...

Exhausted

I officially despise the HOT weather -- I'd take an igloo over an oven any day! I just got back from a BIG family reunion--TONS OF GOOD FOOD!!! Oh man! Now it can't compete w/ my friend's family functions I'm sure-(They're like expert Norwegian Chefs! - some of the best food I've tasted, no doubt!) - Anyway!! ---- So ya...I've spent most of my weekend explaining just why I wanted to be a Veterinarian to my entire extended family - And of course everyone wanted to hear some crazy college stories...They're animals I tell ya!..Animals.
So around dusk, I start playin' guitar..singin some mellow songs while I catch some of the meteor shower. A small crowd of cousins and close family start to close in; I look down from the sky and see all these eyes lookin' at me watchin' me play, and sing ( I don't usually sing in public...but they kinda snuck up on me, errr) So after I'm sufficiently drained by mosquitoes, I pack up the guitar so I can get inside...My dad tells me he didn't know I was that good, lol...I was like...Ummmmm thanks. At that point I was ready to go to bed...but did I get to bed? NO!!! My cousin and his girlfriend were in the room I was going to sleep in! And there's like literally nowhere else to go to bed, so I tough it out until about 1:00 AM. Then I just go outside and wander around for a while...Long story short, I got involved in a late night water-gun fight. I'm not talkin' a nice easy game of water pistol tag...This was hardcore! It was like pitch black, and people were hiding behind trees making secret signals that sounded like bird-calls--and setting up booby-traps! Like real navy-seal stuff, lol. ( you've got to understand - my family thrives on competition! Sort of like 'Meet the Parents' during the whole pool-volleyball scene. So around 4:00 AM this morning, I have to switch out of my drenched clothes into my pajamas. I get to the room to lay down...I had forgotten my pillow, blanket, ect... You know all the things that help you sleep...Well I had none! I laid down on the floor (Which isn't bad at all - I prefer the floor actually; better for your back - plus it's just more convenient) ANYWAY! - I just put my hat over my eyes, and put my hand behind my head for a pillow, and finally get some sleep at around 5:30-6....
Fast Forward -- 7:00 the same morning...Just as I get into my deep sleep, my cousin decides it's time to get up, and she stands on my back, and pokes my sides until she felt I was sufficiently tortured. -- more and more people start showing up to the reunion, and about 2:00, it's blazing hot, and the only thing to do is swim! So I dive into the pond, and it's someone's great idea to start a diving contest. Being a competitive family...Let's say it got out of hand quickly. In like 20 minutes I went from doing swan dives to jumping "Superman style" over some homemade obstacles, and taking boogie boards off a ramp (Which ended with the boogie board breaking in two over my face -- sounds like a good time huh?...Once again...They're animals!)
That's not the worst of it yet -- I'm on a pontoon boat, in the middle of the pond...I don't know if you've ever seen those gladiator shows where they play king of the mountain-like games, and they hit each other with these long sticks -- but that's what I was thrown into! I was just resting on the pontoon, and my cousin comes up (About 6'2/195 vs. Me; 6'/165 -- not a HUGE difference - but just to give you an idea) He wanted to throw me off the pontoon! I resisted of course, and soon our ants, uncles, parents, grandparents, and great aunt/uncles started standing around the pond taking pictures, and throwing us noodles(those floppy flotation devices) to hit each other with...That's just not normal....And that's what was running though my head as I knocked him into the pond - looking out around the pond to the relatives taking pictures...
So I leave the reunion to go to ANOTHER reunion! My old neighbors invited my family over for a nice little reunion. And it was MUCH more tame than the one I had just left! There was more great food, and neighbors I've not seen since like middle school! But you know it lost it's luster after the first couple hours...I was just doin' the same song and dance there - explaining just why I want to be a Vet, and of course they all wanted to hear some crazy college stories. Just give it a rest! GOSH!!
Anyway..I'll post more later - I'm SO TIRED RIGHT NOW! I'm going to get to bed...FINALLY. Please leave a message -
-Ryan

Photography -- J.A. Park - Trees

Took it at Johnny Appleseed park --

Photography!! -- RR Gods

Railroad gods...self explanatory

Photography!! -- trudging through the marshes

Took this when I went trudging through the "wet lands" down on engle road - Some of the picture got cut off when I scanned it...but you're not missing much, lol.

Photography!! -- Abstract

This is me trying my hand at abstract photography, lol

Pen Sketches, Cont.

If you think this looks a little "Edward Hopper" you're right -- I saw a sketch of his like this, and couldn't get it out of my head -- So if you were wondering what I did during my Botany lectures...Now it's no longer a mystery, lol. Botany like doubled as my art class!

Pen Sketches

"Cry Baby" -- Not one of my favorites 'cause I didn't draw the whole face...but whatever -- It's just a sketch, lol.

Written after listening to "Tool"

A stale mist hangs here
As a child it would've frightened me --
But any fear would've been diluted by the reassurance of it's absurdity
-----I wake up to it every day-----
Sleep brings no relief when you can't discern between the nightmares and this place you've inherited
-----This place is poison-----
Colors have seemed to've evaporated
It had to've been subtle or I never would've accepted it
Any feeling of levity is reminiscent
-----Sharp pain follows-----
Pain tries to accumulate and escape through tears
though they too seemed to've evaporated
-----My eyes burn-----
-----This is Hell-----

--I wrote this after watching the video for "Stinkfist" by Tool. If you get the chance - check it out...Tool videos are always kinda odd, even scary at times -- but I can never look away, lol. "Stinkfist" is kinda depressing - if you couldn't tell by the preceding...poetry I suppose you'd call it.
--I'll blog more later, I'm pretty tired now. Feel free to leave a message
-Ryan